Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Earth hour celebrations: The BESCOM style

Majority of us heard a lot about 'Earth Hour' in last one week. People celebrated 'Earth Hour' by switching off electricity between 8:30pm to 9:30pm on 27th March. And many in Bangalore burnt Candles (not their fingers, I believe) to celebrate. I was wondering, is there any better way to celebrate. One thought occurred to my mind is to have 'Full night' cricket match at Chinnaswamy Stadium with flood lights on. Do not mistake me, although at the outset I look very satirical (why flood lights to celebrate earth hour), but it is not so. We could have played without light in the night, but cameraman cannot see those elite people in the VIP stand and major complaint will be from the spectators for not seeing anyone on the ground. I also thought of providing infrared spectacles to all, any way this is how I think.

All these thoughts were taking some shape in my mind, suddenly my wife came running to me and said, 'Guru, street lights are on!' without allowing her to complete the sentence, I told 'so what?'. She is more patient than me, she politely said, 'it's ON even now and the time is 9:30AM'. I was about to tell! 'Eureka', controlled myself, did not express the feeling, otherwise she might ask for the copyright of the thought. Indeed, this is the most fascinating way to celebrate Earth Hour. It's a common practice in Bangalore to celebrate Kannada Rajyotsava till December 31st of the year, although officially it must be on November 1st. So I thought, 'what an idea' these BESCOM people have, they are in fact celebrating Earth hour, although not on 27th, but on 31st March (Important to note here is that they have not forgot, applause for their memory!) and more importantly, it's a brilliant idea to keep all the street lights on in broad day light, which is quite innovative and impressive than switching off them in late nights where nobody would have noticed. Simply keeping all street lights on during day (point to note here is that these street lights are not our CFL's, or tube lights, they are sodium vapour lamp, consumes just 70% more power) and tell the world 'We also celebrated Earth hour' in a typical Desi Style. Congratulations BESCOM, you did it and made us proud!!

Pushpak: The Mythological Aeroplane in Bangalore, one can see heaven in Rs. 10.

I am quite fortunate to have migrated to Bangalore from a not-so urbanized city called Shimoga, so does many more Bangaloreans, to get to know 'heaven' from close quarters on earth. I feel that we who geotag many places should also geotag "Pushpak" with "heaven in Bangalore". Oh, sorry, I dragged you guys somewhere else like our godly swamijis and politicians do. Thanks to our conductor cum driver saheb in these Pushpak, who is the agent directly descended from Indraloka. In fact, I felt quite often to prostrate in front of him, for his godly actions, behavior and above all for 'his driving (s)kills'. oh yes! I just forgot to tell you, as the name suggests Pushpak is divine aero-plane from BMTC, rendering help in getting connected between God and people.

I will narrate an occasion, where in, I was taken to heaven and just because I am very humanly, I was sent back to earth to lead this meaningless research life. It happened few weeks back. I was walking very fast rather it was a kind of running to catch '276'(It's just the route number, nothing to do with similar looking numbers).

As I stood near the entrance arch of Sri Kalika Durga Parameshwari Temple at Vidyaranyapura, a gray coloured aeroplane (looking something like mythological Rakshasa/demon) with LED display of Vidyaranyapura to Majestic scrolling from right to left and 276 displayed at the centre of the board 'landed' before me. Oh God sent! I thought, thanked god and entered the vehicle. Soon it turned out to be true, such things are made in heaven, packed in heaven and even drove by heavenly people.

As I just put two steps into the bus, the Godly agent sitting on the driver's seat uttered 'tigiet'. Since there were no one behind me nor in front of me, I told myself that he was talking to me and realized there was no additional conductor in this bus. Meanwhile, he had already pulled a ticket and was pressing Accelerator peddle, both hands being free from the staring wheel, fully occupied with notes folded horizontally and kept between fingers (imagine how we used to write Sun's diagram, few lines radiating out of circular body, similarly currency notes were emanating from the spaces between his fingers)in one hand and other with booklets of tickets. He two hands looked like Vishnu's 'dasha hastas'. There was a pen tucked between 2nd and 3rd finger in the same hand which has currency notes between all fingers. The first two fingers are lingering to pull the ticket, which is in the other hand. Simultaneously, these two hands are also on steering wheel and the gear lever. Now, I feel you must have also felt 'the Vishnu' I saw with naked eyes. I am not as good as Sanjaya to describe Sri Vishnu. Please do not mistake me of comparing you people to Dhrutarashtra, my conversation ends at Sanjaya as a story teller and nothing beyond. At this instance, I felt, he cannot be human, because he is doing so non-humanly activities. My eyes became wet, voice got struck in the throat, tongue unable to utter, I was shivering.

Soon, few bikes/cars honked as though some one has ran on their foot. This brought me back from the deep trance. I looked around to figure out, why such nuisance, why people won't allow for some one to experience heaven in Rs.10. Probably, I was not so immersed with his godly act, to me the pushpak seemed have taken some diagonal path and was ready to squeeze two bikers and a car (Alas, these guys did not understand that if they had crushed under Pushpak, they would have directly landed in heaven). But this god man was unfazed by such hue and cry, honks, etc, he was as cool as cucumber!, composed and did not even see the side mirror so as to know why the vehicles honked. He simply turned the steering wheel with his multi tasking hands, it automatically aligned itself to the road. See his magical touch. I was again astonished with his skills.

This processes did happen in all stops, its not because all the bus stops in Bangalore are unscientific (what small thinking! if you also have thought so), it is because the driver was told not to show any racial, facial, sexual or intersexual discrimination for all the heaven seekers. For one thing, I must really appreciate, he was dedicated to his work. No matter whether ambulance passes by, signal shows red, people on the last step of exit, he mercilessly did his part of showing us heaven. Most surprising part was when I was made to depart from this heavenly vehicle. It was right in front of Sadashivanagar Police station, the driver took out his mobile and was searching for something in it. I requested him to stop at CPRI stop, but he wanted to show me much more. As the signal was red, he finally opened the door and asked me to get down, as though strictly implementing some ones suggestion. I felt, may be this is what he was searching on his mobile and GOD must have told him to leave me back on earth and take others along!!

No sense of sides, no sense of speed, no sense of priority and no sense of respecting signal, I think these are the prime qualities of this godly man to make him agent of GOD. Hope many of you must have also experienced the same! I am just worried, will we ever get a human being to drive these vehicles? Will they ever have any sense of driving? Will it ever happen? God only knows.